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| Transplanar Refugees. - Paranormal - Hyperspace Member Forums - Hyperspace Cafe Metaphysical Forum | |||||||||||||||
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Ezrah Hyperspace Warrior 
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This might be a little strange; but since early in my life I've lived, at least in my private life, as something other than "who" the world likes to think of me as. I cover it, up act "normal" for the general population, and generally conceal my true nature to the best of my ability. I'm a reincarnationist, but not the kind one normally encounters; I'm non-human, though none of the various non-humans I generally hear people speak about on various forums about the paranormal or aliens. I'm not an astral being, or of a level of sophitication higher than that of humans; in fact I distinctly remember, in my first life being rather primitive compared to modern humans, comparable to the late bronze age, or early iron age. There is a long story as how to myself, a felid from an early metal-age world ended up here on earth, the details of which I'd be willing to dispense as requested or nessicary; but bassically I'm not from arround here, and I have never really felt like I was. It started years ago, in my young formative years [from what I can see, and understand, people are more succeptible to alteration of the natural psycho-spiritual development paterns at these ages; before their sense of self is fully formed] when another like myself recognized me for what I was and pulled the past out of me; rather forcefully now that I think about it. The experience was a bit more than traumatic, but has left me a better person, at the cost of only slight social alienation, which hardly shows since I can cope with the differences between myself and the general human population fairly well. To date, I've found a healthy number of people from my timeline/reality, as well as a few from others which I can find no [readily observable or accessible] analouge. I've actually found three of my kind, and three more that are either "my kind" or something very similiar from an alternate unfolding of history. I've also encountered members of the various species I had been in contact with , as well as creatures that I've no formal experience with in this life, or any of the others before. I'll note that all of these "others" are all held within human bodies, and seem rather mundane at first glance, for some reason we tend to be good at masking our natures, it might possible be due to the fact that in a sense we are human; we're born into human bodies, and on the outset we're possessing of regular human psycho-spiritual structures... but somewhere along the line we hit a trigger, and the old "us" ends up tearing through the partially developed human youth... the transformation isn't complete obviously, I have a strong suspicion that a complete psycho-spiritual reversion/transformation would result in sociopathy, or complete xenopsychological alienation and isolation of the person in question. The purposes I have in this thread is to see if there are anymore of "us" on this forum; and to ask you, the humans, the "natives" if you will [please don't bite my head off, I don't mean to be offensive with this terminology] what you think of us and our presence here. I have some further agendas and question but I'll take those up after I get some more input; and have a chance to talk to the enlightened souls on here seeking help and clarification. -Sincerely, Ezrah
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Ezrah Hyperspace Warrior
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Hrrm, I've noticed the lack of input. To the best of my ability to discern, I think it might be because of the vaguities of what I've said. I'm sorry everyone, It might seem like I'm trying to bait a response but I'm not; the reason for my lack of details is rooted in my distrust. However, I realize that in order to get some information, input, and analysis of my situation I'm going to have to be a little less guarded with everyone. I'm going to volunteer some information about myself and my origin, this is as frank and honest as I'm capable of being; normally I keep this type of information under close guard... but I think some of you might be insightful, helpful, or wise with situations like my own: Since I'm not that good at freeform exposition, I'll list as many facts as I can think of. 1. My "original self", the self I now take as my own, isn't human; but a sort of feline-ish humanoid though not entirely like the depictions of the kiroti and ari. We're a more hominid species, with the muzzle stunted for a more omnivorous diet, eyes set wide apart for human-like binocular vision, and a few rather un-feline like characteristics setting us closer to a type of precursor species. We evolved at least partially, though I think in our native habitat, there may of been a measurable amount of genetic tampering. 2. I'm not entirely sure I'm from this reality, hence the "trans planar" aspect of my refugee situation. Alot of the information given to me by my restorer, and by the other members of my species I've met points to an extra-planar origin [descriptions of humanity conflicting with reality, common genetic stock with humans, the existence, or absence of reported sentient species.] 3. The fellow "Karotanta" [yes, thats what I think of as the name of my people, I know, odd] I've met are remarkably similiar in psychological and remembered physiological makeup to myself. Two are a mated pair [spiritually mated, they've separated themselves for reason relating to the practicality of their relationship, and the fact that their bad luck seems to increase substantially when involved with one another], and the third and fourth are a male, and female respectively; that appear to come from the spiritualist caste of my species [as I myself do], these two have a strangely accurate ability to predict the actions of others, and their consequences (they're not clairvoyant, its more of an ability to read the threads of interaction that lead to certain consequences in interpersonal communications.) [I myself possess a similar ability though something inherently wrong with my thought processes seems to interfere with this, limiting my predictive powers to a few steps in the process, or purely ordered mechanical interactions *it seems as thought something in my psyche always fails, or is incapable of accounting for the incongruencies of random action and emotion... I myself seem to have a hard time expressing, acting upon, or truth be told recognizing my own emotions*] 4. The female I spoke about in the former point, which is from the spiritualist caste, was my "restorer" was an apparently spontaneous recall, there was no directed call to restore her to her former self... That however is not true of me, she restored me in a psychologically traumatic [at least to the person I used to be] act of subtlety... she didn't force me, but triggered the reemergence of memories repeatedly... resulting in a kind of snowball effect with the old me pushing its way back to consciousness... [and to the best of my knowledge] completely obliterating, or integrating, the human me that existed before. 5. My people in their natural state, have a heavily linked emotional subconscious, an empathic commune of sorts, though not a full blown [and indeed the concept frightens me] hive mind. I believe the state is/was heavily reliant upon the anatomy and neuropsychology of our original forms in conjunction with our psychological structures. [In our human forms, the best we can do is recognize one another for what we are in short order... coupled with a more intense empathy *and at times its rather annoying, at least to me*] 6. The members of other species which I find no reference to here, and which appear to have a similar origin to my own which I've encountered are a race of rodentlike creatures, and caninelike creatures, I've also had an encounter with a reincarnated bug-kin... though I have some sort of inbred prejudice against insects for some reason it seems.] 7. About four or five of those I've found [a simply minority] share at least some aspect of my native reality and time line [we remember events, historical figures, and sometimes even "versions" of each other that are remarkably similar]. 8. Some of the creatures incongruencies of which I spoke on earlier... are the "humanity" I remember... they more closely match the "red-haired folk" celts and germanics, which some people in circles like this one seem to consider as being of a different origin of much of modern humanity. The only truely frightening creatures which I remember are: 1. a race of extremely tall [eight or nine feet, compared to the four to five and a half foot height of my native folk] races of space-farers with disproportionately long arms/legs/fingers, double canine-d jawbones, narrow somewhat high-crowned heads [though their heads, nor their eyes were nowhere near boulbous... their feartures were actually nearly human, except for the prominent bony projections along cranial ridges and fusion lines], and rubbery, dull colored skin. and 2. A race of emaciated insect like creatures, though these things hardly seemed to be physical in nature... they were probably more closely analogous to some sort of demonic or astral entity in this reality. 9. most of us weren't exactly high tech. Most of us would be considered "primitives" by modern earther society, something along the vein of native americans, native africans, or aboriginals in terms of technology or "cultural advancement".] 10. Alot of us seem to succumb to personality disorders... many times personality breakdown and loss of will to live/sense of identity... most of those I've seen it happen to weren't able to retain their original identiy while caged in a human body, within human society... they "broken down" and "Accepted" their humanity. If anyone has any information, any insights of observations, please feel free to speak up, even possible alternative explanations I would find interesting. I'm always open to new information. Last edited on Tue May 13th, 2008 05:25 am by Ezrah |
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DreamTime Here I Be 
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Hello Ezrah, I'm sorry that no one has answered your posts, but I think that they must feel like I do - is this all for real or is this person somewhat...off? I mean what you are saying here kind of sounds like something you would find on the SciFi channel. I don't mean to be offensive to you, but I just thought I should tell you what I feel.
____________________ Life's journey is not to arrive safely at the grave in a well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out shouting, "HOLY COW...WHAT A RIDE!" Check out the SALE at my store: http://www.dreamtimecreations.etsy.com |
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GertrudaRose Hyperspace Warrior
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I agree. I just don't have a point of reference to make meaning out of your post. I can't even figure out if you are looking for some type of response. I simply can't wrap my little brain around your concepts. Sorry.
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Astrojewels Super Moderator 
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Dido, I understand what you have wrote, especially the refugee concept because in reality we are all refugees, but I do not understand why you have wrote this. Ezrah, please explain your form, you say you are non-human so what do you look like to the world? From what I have read so far, I can only say that you are heavily programmed into your XY generation. I mean no offense by this and you are asking for a response.
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Ezrah Hyperspace Warrior
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Physically I'm human. Its a spiritual and psychological thing... I react much differently to situations than most people I've observed, and its not a complete and utter psychological differentiation since psychology is at least partially determined by neurochemistry and brain structure. what I "am" and what I "feel" conflict to an extent... I'm highly communal, enjoying harmony cooperation and egalitarianism... empathic to a level that's uncommon, though not unheard of [psychological trauma from empathy has a very high psychosomatic conversion rate with me... I've never been able to effectively lie, steal, cheat, or harm others because of this; though I don't feel compelled nor desire too], I have a need of people due to my communal nature; and I feel compelled to help everyone I can, and give all people the benefit of the doubt... However, like I said there is conflict between how I am and think; and what I'm experiencing. In the past I've been antisocial, because I didn't like the "feelings" coming off of other people, it causes me discomfort that egalitarianism won't work with the current stock of humanity that is present... the empathy agitates and bothers me at times partially because a lot of what the majority of people put off isn't good, and partially because I can't seem to interpret portions of it; and I often end up cutting myself off and being hyper defensive because of the world I'm within... In the end of course my instincts win over, but it troubles me. I've also really never experienced jealousy, or feelings of possession/possessiveness; though in my youth I had a problem with my anger and aggression [this is before the person that pulled my current persona to the surface did so.] My current thinking is that there is a conflict between my "inner" self, the creature I described in the previous post; my biological self, and my reactions to my environment. I'll also not that I more than likely have a significant amount of genetic deviation... I was born premature, enough to warrant being on a respirator until my body started breathing on its own... my parents both had problems with substance abuse, my father in particular his drugs of choice being meth and cocaine both genotoxins... along with possible mental problems from both sides of the family [father being aggression/anger, and mother a possible manic depressive] luck however seemed to have been on my side, I came out a relatively stable, and responsible individual, with no physical or mental handicaps... despite the fact that the chances of both were very present. [Both of my parents are "recovered" now, or more aptly, "recovering" since addiction is a lifelong battle.] And the main reason I created the post was to get others opinions, thoughts, possible alternate explanations; and if any were forthcoming, stories from people in similar situations or with similar experiences first or secondhand information both appreciated. A secondary "agenda" being to share my experiences with others, and to be shared with in return. I'm a prolific reader of scientific and esoteric material, I've always been open to new theories and possibilities; and I always enjoy new information. Last edited on Wed May 14th, 2008 03:59 am by Ezrah |
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Astrojewels Super Moderator
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Ezrah, You seek alternative explanations and what you must ask yourself is ‘do you really want to hear them?’ The way you explain your feelings indicates you are in conflict with your physical and non-physical bodies, and you are not alone. I see you as a classic case of victim mentality entering a physical existence in order to change that attribute of your soul-personality. The ideas that you have come to believe are from new age beliefs that are targeted to the youth of today to replace religion and controlled belief systems. The agenda of such beliefs is to make you want to connect collectively, however your inner pain and sensitivity restricts the ego personality in standing forthright, it is also to take away the original purpose of female/male, to instill more confusion. I assume you are fairly young, this is how you present yourself, and you seek answers to these beliefs that you have come to accept, because you know on a higher level that these are not accurate. You may feel like a refugee, and perhaps in past life-streams you were a refugee because your life so far does have that pattern of thought, your parents, your birth, the isolation and antisocialism. Your birth explains a great deal of how your mind-pattern was pre-birth and also indication to the previous life-streams. If your guidance from the person who pulled you from your persona was accurate, you would have no need to seek others like yourself through the net, the higher levels of awareness between your clan would work on the ‘telepathic web’ you would all find each other through means that standard humans could not grasp. You would not be feeling so much inner conflict, you would accept that you are on a mission and have purpose. Researching programming, particularly genetic programming, will provide some answers to your questions.
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Ezrah Hyperspace Warrior
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I'm taking into account what you say, and it probably is a heavy consideration. There is definitely a sense of "programming" both in the metaphysical and traditional senses. Through my explorations I've come into information and people that indicate or state that humanity exists in an altered state of consciousness [not elevated, simply altered]; though, for the most part, what I see and hear is either self-induced, or suppression [attempts to stop humanity from advancing and spreading "before" they're ready] from the outside. On a personal level, there is most certainly alot written into my genes... if nothing else than by my parents family histories and choices... psychologically I've dealt with parts of my humanity that I don't undestand/don't care for [anger particularily] by "changing" myself... and I've always had a sense of artificiality. There is a chance that the person that recalled me may of simply "created me" as a response to the void created by the loss of the "real" me... so its a possibility that I'm a reconstruction of this "person" as she remembers him... but in any case the sense of "reality" that I get off of the image of myself is very potent... even though right now I may be a shadow of my [or his, its a posibility] former self. [my overactive left brain makes me contemplate possible explanations, reactions, and courses of events... I do it all the time, at work... playing games, writing... even in interpersonal interactions... years ago it was so bad that it stopped me from acting... paralyzed me; but I made the determination that its better to do and risk, than live in fear of possibilities and /never/ do anything...] So far as I know, my beliefs are my own... I rarely share them with people, and during the recall of my older self... she didn't actually "instill" much into me... what she essentially did was dredge up a residual self... highly incomplete... my "history" and my "theory of souls" are predominantly constructed from the memories I have remembered, and information I've gleaned from my studies of psychology and physics. [to clarify I don't believe in a "Sentient God" I believe in "god" as a force, a process, or a medium for existence... but not as anything that can classically be defined as "sentient" *as something aware of itself and its surroundings, capable of "thoughts" and "feelings" and imbedded with a sense of self.*] And to an extent I can "discover" others like myself, and I am drawn to them, though its more of a vauge feeling, a kinship, than a knowing [to the best of my knowledge, we didn't have wide scale telepathy to complement our empathic nature.] But my human body and mind-set dampen that to an extent... I often feel their presence lacking. And I am possessed of a mission... but the parts of my mind and brain that are analytical and ordered... heavily bound to reality; make me doubt their validity and feasibility. [The "mission" the compulsion which I feel most of the time, and which is a large part of my conflict with my physical existence... is that I feel completely "unlike" my physical body... "I" want to be restored to not only who I was, but what I was... but the part of me with my grounded to my observable reality... tells me that its impossible... or at least impractical and highly improbable... The other "mission" I have is related to increase the presence of my kind... to remedy the problem caused to me emotionally by having more of "us" here (though not necessarily "less" of you, you referring to humanity) again, my left brain tells me its not realistic and possible... though I would find delight and completion in somehow achieving both...] and yes, I'm "fairly" young, I'm going on twenty seven this time around... the first time around, I don't think I ever made it past 30.
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Astrojewels Super Moderator
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Ezrah, When you say ‘what I was’ please explain further.
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William Moderator 
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Non of us are Humans, we did not start here, Not all of us are even Human so to speak. I am not this body or even this personality. The Earth is not our true home, so we are all Refugees. all i can say here is that you could of wrote all this about me! Im not doubting or saying anything against what your saying. Its really up to you to KNow yourself! And I like reading what you have wrote!  Have you read up here on Programming? (I would like to say that anything other then being God connected Intelligence is an aberration, but that does not sound right. But think about it anyway!)
____________________ I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering. |
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Ezrah Hyperspace Warrior
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What I meant is that my one of my biggest drives... which partially fuels my interests in the sciences... is to find a way to bring the remainder of my people here [I don't think its possible to go back, I'm not even sure there is a place to go back to anymore], and to restore fully, not only our memories and personalities, but our physical forms as well... essentially, I would like to revert to my original species. To clarify, I remember my people as a somewhat smallish [smaller than humans by about a foot], feline like [with a few notable difference, I think we're closer to the "predecessor species" that links canines and felines] bipedal race with fully articulated fingered hands, and high arched plantigrade feet; as well as a subconsciously empathic society, and a penchant for a little harmless hedonism, spirits, and music. we're not a superior species or anything like that... we have a weaker sense of drive than humans do... leaning in slower technological expansion... but I miss my old existence, and the connectivity of my people. as for programming, I haven't read up on it here... but I get an intrinsic sense of what it pertains too... and possibly entails... built in psychological structures that trigger specified behaviors, thought patterns, and further changes to the host, correct? Last edited on Fri May 16th, 2008 05:41 pm by Ezrah |
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Astrojewels Super Moderator
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Ezrah, Interesting, and allow me to ask another question, the people that you have connected with here from your original species, do they feel the same way that you do in this existence? I must question this because you do not know the specifics of your original existence; therefore this is why I feel it is your programming. Just like William has pointed out, none of us started as humans and many people on this forum have discussed the connection to their original species, and that feeling of wanting to go home, and feeling trapped in the human form; a form of imprisonment. There is a purpose for you to experience this life in human form and while you continue to battle the knowing, instead of accept, this drive will continue to feed the inner conflict. People, humans as you call them, have wonderful attributes; there are many great people in this world. Perhaps looking at your purpose in a different perspective will allow you to evolve from your original species to a greater species, one that has combined with the many great human ones! You can only grow from who you are or who you have been, transforming to a different species will not change who you are inside.
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Ezrah Hyperspace Warrior
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Sorry for the delay, I was out of town for about five days at a convention, then I had an uninterrupted run at work to make up for the days that I requested off... As for the other people from my species reacting as I do... yes, we're generally empathically oversensitive [at least in human terms], feel somewhat isolated from the "normal" human population, and most of us feel a desire to return to our former state. The method, and extent to which we can deal with these symptoms however varies wildly... I've seen better than myself, and I've seen worse. As far as not knowing my species... I know what we called ourself Karotanta, shortened form of Karo-Konantia [a term meaning something akin to "children of the world spirit"] what I meant is that aside from the others I know of, there are very few accounts of creatures similar to what I was. I believe I described what we were like [at least physically] in a previous post. And... I don't hate humanity... far from it, its just that the unharmonious and disquiet nature of the majority of them disturbs me... all the turmoil puts strain on me, and all the negative emotion that it generates effects me negatively. I understand, and recognize that there are some, perhaps even a lot of them that are "more akin" to myself... its just the "bad" ones tend to be louder/more aggressive/more pronounced. And I completely agree with you... the first life that "strongly" imprints your psyche... that is the one that you will always identify most strongly with, regardless of what you become... its a loaded issue though, since its hard to say if those first few formative imprints of consciousness determine what species you see yourself as... or if your nature determines what you first "arrive" as. the conflict that I feel from inside is a bit different though... its not really a conflict between my "human self" and my "alien self" there is only one me... its more of a conflict between my brain and my spirit... I've always had a problem, prehaps even to the point of defect... my emotions seem muted at times, and I've overly logical... I tend to get locked into modes/lines of thought, topics, and activities... I think its probably related to a defect/difference in my neurochemistry that has yet to be detected. Last edited on Wed May 28th, 2008 02:51 am by Ezrah |
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GertrudaRose Hyperspace Warrior
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There are many beings that have evolved to the point of feeling the oneness of energy. Of course, this causes us to be extremely sensitive to the energy of everyone around us and many people are still caught up in the negative and fearful state encouraged by TPTB. My soul group has tried many things to try to protect ourselves from the onslaught and nothing is impermiable, but I can suggest that the best defense is a "good energy offense". By that I mean that if you keep your energy strong on the good side, it helps buffer the negative coming at you from others. One other suggestion I have is that you may be doing like I did at one time - retreat into logic to try to block out the emotional when it is overwhelming. These are just ideas, take what is helpful and leave the rest.
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Astrojewels Super Moderator
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Good advice GR. Ezrah, What you describe is really not that different to how many people feel, and I certainly do not see it as a defect, we are entering, and have been for some time, a higher collective frequency and for those that are sensitive to this growth will feel as you do especially towards the ‘bad’ ones, the human essence is splitting and segregating but not just through religion, politics, race or color. Currently we are feeling the separation of kindness and brutality in our world, and all occurrences will have no medium like the past, but all things require you to look at the picture behind the picture to understand both, because presently many people that are sensitive to the higher frequency can tell you of a situation that has unfolded with bizarre sequential steps. All that matters is you feel good about who you are, and do not let any situation or person take that away from you.
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Ezrah Hyperspace Warrior
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Sorry about the long absence, I've been working and stressed. They upgraded me to full time recently, so my work load increased drastically. Along with the fact that my never ending bad luck has seemed to kick back in. [I didn't mentioned this before; but in January, I fell asleep at the wheel on a return trip from a large social event, and rolled a car.] It struck again recently, in the form of stolen art equipment and a laptop, trouble with my family, and the CV joint on my car going out while I was dropping off my boyfriend. I've recently been talking to the one who woke me up, and witnessed the true extent of her psychological deterioration... she's become unstable, can't remember anymore, can't sort her memories out from her dreams. Its getting to the point where her psyche is coming into direct conflict with the portion of her original psych ingrained into her physical form. I've also experienced episodic conflict as well, resulting in either psychological troubles [depression, confusion, partial reversions, etc.] or physical conditions [pains in the rear portion of my skull, feelings of pressure along my temples, increased body temperature, and in at least one instance, a strange condition where I lost complete control of my body, though I could still see, and hear... though the whole thing seemed as if it was coming through a white noise filter.] Though, unlike her... I've always come out on top; unphased, or stronger than before. No personality degradation or collapse. She's also started saying things, that confirmed a growing suspicious of mine. She states that her memories of me are only partially congruent with mine of myself, yet there are others who remember me as I do, or at least in a more similar manner. It seems I'm a composite, bits and pieces of two similar entities, melded into a whole. Or perhaps, just as likely, Two distinct phases of existence of the same entity. On a related note... many of the others seem to have acute psychological problems... its much worse than I originally thought... everything from debilitating anxiety troubles, to the inability to properly form interpersonal attachments... Many of them are actually "diagnosable" though they're always emotional instabilities, not cognitive ones... no dementia, no schizophrenia, no delusional complexes [unless of course you're of the opinion that we're delusional by virtue of our memories and sense of self.] I personally have a very limited sense of self [for the most part, I am defined by those who have a need or love for/of me, and by what task/project I'm devoting my time/energy too.] Coupled with very weak self esteem, and a near debilitating tendency to over analyze things. Oh yeah, since I mentioned the bad luck I've been having... that is another common theme... nearly all of us seem to have spectacular, and spectacularly long running bouts of ill luck. Be it financial, interpersonal, or genetic. I personally seem to have the devil's luck, on several occasions, I've had to watch the whole world crash and burn around me... without being so much as singed. [The rollover isn't the first, I've been in several near misses and quite a few situations where I should of been injured; physically, emotionally, and financially, though I always completely dodge physical injury.] Hope this is all helpful or informative. Last edited on Mon Aug 11th, 2008 09:40 am by Ezrah |
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